coming up for air

Friends, thank you for your lovely comments and emails. It’s the only bright spot in my very long and grueling final days in *hell.* Some dumb things that happened this week:

  • Attempted to write 2 papers (25 pages each) in about one week. Granted I did the research before hand but suffice to say it was grueling. (I reserve all judgment until they let me know I passed.) Never been so academically panicked before in my life. Never again. (Oh wait…the bar….)
    • I swear at some point I did this during my undergrad. (Jess, you recall?) But boy, I remember that being a LOT easier to do.
  • stayed at school for 30-40 hours straight…i felt so gross

I learned:

  • that I cansit on my ass for 12 hours at a time…my back now hates me.
  • that fear is a deeply motivating factor.
  • to keep a brown paper bag handy–you never know when you’re going to start hyperventilating.
  • I can stay up for 40 hours straight without dying. (Hmmm…maybe I still got it?) Seriously, how do doctors do it? And why do we let them treat us when they’re *that* tired? I wouldn’t trust myself right now to slap a bandaid on somebody, let alone do surgery….

Rest tonight. Resume cramming tomorrow. See you on the other side!


2 responses to “coming up for air

  1. For some reason, I wrote my best papers while under time pressure. If I tried to write the papers ahead of time, I wouldn’t score as well. Yeah, I am a procrastinator. 🙂

  2. Yes you did–we ALL did! Glad you’re in the final push. I was actually wondering this week if my tendency to procrastinate has trained me to be super-efficient and come through in the clutch or if I procrastinated because I knew the end result would be about the same, except I could have more fun in the meantime. I think my worst papers were the ones I started early–it’s much easier to focus only on what’s relevant when you’re up against the wall.

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